Tuesday, July 12, 2005

100 things about me.

Well, I've seen these posts on other blogs and kinda dismissed them. But, you know, Lowly Scribe says that "I think I read in the fine print somewhere that the blog Gods come and shut you down if you don't do one yourself eventually". So I am bowing to the powers that be. Plus, the last few that I read made me wonder what I'd have to say about myself. In fact I wonder if there are 100 things to say about me. It may be a stretch. Here goes.

1. Riarug - what is it? Well my middle name is Moria (pronounced Mariah) and I had very shaggy hair as a kid. The kind that matched the rya rug that used to lie on my parents living room (I grew up in the 70s). My dad used to call me ria rug and I was never sure whether it started because of my middle name or whether it was because of my hair. I like to think its both - My “Ria rug”.

2. My name. I was named for an old girlfriend of my dad's. She was never billed as such, but I have my suspicions that if she wasn't - he wanted her to be. He says he just liked the name. Hmmm. Really. My middle name. I was named for the song "They Call the Winds Moria". I looked it up on an atlas once. There is actually a wind called Moria in Mexico. In Manitoba, they actually call the ugly fish, known here as Ling or burbot, Mariah. Lucky me.

3. I was born in Whitehorse, Yukon and prefer cold weather to hot.

4. I have a half brother, whom I have never met, that my mom was forced to give up when she was 18.

5. My husband and I have a wonderful relationship and despite the trend that prevails today, I can honestly see us growing old together.

6. My husband is the only man I have ever slept with.

7. I went to University for Photography but didn't complete it due to a creative depression.

8. I went back to college months later and graduated with a 4.0 grad average in Small Business Management.

9. I once owned a Cockatoo. Phew - It was a hard to choice to make, boyfriend (at the time) or parrot. Boyfriend won, but yuk it was a horrible feeling to give the parrot away.

10. I used to have pet rats and have passed to love on to my niece who just got her first rat a week ago.

11. I always wanted to be an architect.

12. I secretly wish to be one of those girls people stop and stare at when you walk by. Don't we all?

13. I think constantly, I lie awake at night and think about creating - to the point of seeing each bead being sewn onto a piece.

14. I hardly ever say what I am thinking for fear that I'll be misunderstood or that what I say will somehow be inappropriate. Hence, I laugh a lot inside at the oddness of people and the irony of existence.

15. I have suffered from severe panic attacks in the past. My husband has suffered through them with me and supported me. I haven't had one since I stopped taking The Pill. Hmmm.

16. I worked for my father for 5 years and had a better relationship, although it was very stressful, with him during that time than I had most of my life.

17. As a child, I spent summers at a family cottage and lived like a wild child most days, swimming, canoeing, building forts, playing with leeches, crayfish, frogs, minnows and snakes, all with little or no adult supervision.

18. I wish I could give my daughter that same opportunity but am saddened that I take my parental responsibilities WAY to seriously and because of that she will have a lessor appreciation of nature and of herself.

19. I love to eat bananas dipped in Miracle Whip.

20. I have not been able to drink milk since my daughter was born. No ice cream either.

21. My husband and I considered moving to the Dominican Republic and opening up our own restaurant. In fact, I will be surprised if at some point in our life we don’t attempt a operate a restaurant at least once.

22. I have read Piers Anthony's Xanth novels so many times I practically have them memorized.

23. I spent my teenage years mostly in my bedroom drawing and playing classical guitar.

24. I don't like playing my guitar when other people are around because it is for me. I prefer to play guitar at 5:0o in the morning on the dock at the cottage when the loons are crying out on the water and the mist is rising from the lake.

25. I spend time on the internet when I should be working.

26. I don't like working with other women. I hate gossip and I dislike how women cut each other down. Women should support each other in their endeavours.

27. "Piecework" is my favourite magazine because I covet historical textile research.

28. I miss photography and I haven't photographed anything other than children since I left university, because it hurts too much.

29. I doodle trees and rocks all the time and can sketch a northern Ontario landscape from memory.

30. I study genealogy and have found and visited the grave of my first paternal ancestor in Canada.

31. If I won a lot of money I would go back to school and learn to blow glass, weave and make jewellery. Just for the love of creating.

32. I hate useless things and would rather embroider a beautiful pot holder than a sculpture that collects dust.

33. I sing when I am in the car and encourage my daughter to sing at all times and not to be ashamed to express herself with her body or voice.

34. I don't who god is or what roll he plays in my life.

35. I believe there must be other life somewhere out there and that it has figured out how to be better at living in harmony with each other than we have.

36. I have toyed with the idea in the past of joining the army. You know - to see the world.

37. I wish I could speak many languages.

38. I like math. I really like math.

39. I can compose my own music on the piano, but have never taken lessons.

40. I like medieval music, clothing, and art.

41. I love riding my bicycle.

42. I love that my husband knows just what to buy me for Christmas and that every present has been so important to me.

43. I want to design and sew my own clothes.

44. I can't whistle. People usually laugh at me when I try.

45. I prefer to paint with acrylics over water colour and oil. I prefer to draw using pen and ink than any other medium.

46. I love black and white photography.

47. I love antiques and history.

48. I believe in faeries and encourage my daughter to believe too.

49. I used to have a velour sweater I snuggled with as a child and I called it my suvvy.

50. From time to time I have dreams of all of my teeth falling out.

51. I love to travel.

52. I think I am truly blessed to have my daughter.

53. I have way too much craft stuff but can't bear to part with any of it.

54. I am in constant pain from Fibromyalgia and am pleased with the fact that I didn't think of writing it on the list until more than halfway down.

55. I am nervous about my daughter growing up as an only child.

56. I love being nude. If people wouldn't stare or wonder at my sanity, I would be nude as often as possible.

57. I once saw a ghost of a little girl.

58. I like old coins.

59. I once let an albino python curl all around me and I petted her head and enjoyed that I wasn't afraid of it at all.

60. I love the smell of hay and the sounds of creaking wood in old barns.

61. I prefer large dogs such as Irish Wolfhounds and Great Danes.

62. I prefer sun rises to sun sets.

63. I am a morning person and love getting up and working when no one else is awake.

64. I love that people love to visit us and that they like to eat the food we make.

65. I wish I could be a green thumb like my mom.

66. One day I would like to publish a "How-To" book.

67. The part of my job I like best is formatting. I take people's reports and publications and make them look good!

68. I hate accounting, which is mostly what my job is all about.

69. I never wanted to be the disciplinarian in my household because my father was severe and I hated it, but that is the role I am stuck playing. Hence my husband and daughter half jokingly nicknamed me "the warden".

70. I am covered with freckles, I used to hate it but now I love it!

71. I like being strange.

72. I love to swim and would spend the day in water if I could.

73. I've been dying my hair red.

74. I listen to CBC radio every day, grew up listening to it and can't take listening to garbage radio stations which play music mindlessly.

75. I love the old Doctor Who.

76. I once took a political science class in university and didn't understand any of it. And that fact makes me feel good.

77. When I was a teenager, I used to hang out at the local Indian Friendship Centre, where I played badminton, went to Pow Wows and learned to do and love beadwork.

78. I used to have a serious addiction to chocolate and would go through all my cupboards looking for anything chocolate including unsweetened chocolate baking squares. I have given up chocolate and rarely eat it because I realized that it caused mood swings.

79. I want to learn to weld.

80. I love wind chimes.

81. I never thought I could teach but now I consider taking on that role.

82. I think heaven is skipping rocks across the water with my daughter.

83. I use to hide behind my mother's legs when I was a child, but now I can address a crowd of hundreds.

84. I honestly feel that looking good in a bikini has less to do with your body than your confidence.

85. I think confidence has less to do with feeling self-assured and able to perform than it does with the realization that everyone else is feeling just as self-conscience and worried about their abilities as you are. Once you get that knowledge into your head it's easier to dismiss your anxiety and get on to enjoying the rewards that confidence brings.

86. I love fires.

87. I like my hands even though they are not beautiful. I hate my feet because they are not beautiful.

88. My brother and I used to fight horribly. In fact I once stuck a fork in his back. We lived in a pretty mixed up household. Its polar emotions could be illustrated in this example: Once while we were fighting - meaning me trying to scratch his eyes out in angry frustration, tears rolling down my cheeks. He, being 3 1/2 years older, would normally put his hand on my head or chest so I couldn't reach him. He once stopped fighting and stared at me saying quietly "do you ever have beautiful eyes when you cry" and then resumed bugging the crap out of me.

89. When I snuggle with my daughter, it makes me feel closer to my mother.

90. I went to school in French for 5 years and don't feel comfortable speaking French even though I made good grades.

91. I am proud that I was able to buy our home myself, with my own income.

92. I am not happy in my job.

93. I have green eyes.

94. I have a bad temper, but I haven't lost it in years.

95. I don't like the colour red or yellow.

96. I wish I could speak Latin and used to love making and breaking codes as a child.

97. My dream life would be to be completely self sufficient. Not connected to the grid, make our own energy, clothing, grow our own food. I envy the Amish and Mennonites and if my husband was amendable, I could be convinced to convert.

98. I prefer to save rather than spend.

99. I will have fulfilled a lifetime goal when I am a self employed artist.

100. I don't know who I am, but I see little kernels of someone who might be me when I re-read this journal.


Anonymous cindy said...

Wow, I am quite impresed. I love reading how you can actually put your feelings, likes, dislikes, dreams, accomplishments and thoughts into words. You are a true gift.

10:56 a.m.  
Blogger ria said...

Actually, I'm impressed too. It's an interesting excercise once you start it and I would be interested to see what came out of my brain if I wrote 1000 things about me. Maybe a journal based on that premise is in order?
Thank you for your compliments. Sometimes I feel I made an error in sharing the address to this blog. I wonder how much more I would share if I wasn't conscience that those who know me read my blog? But then again that knowledge in itself teaches me about myself. It's all good.

11:08 a.m.  

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